Pride is over, things are settling down, we're all tired (I stayed home from work today, being incredibly tired) and in need of rest. Actually, in the last couple of Pride days, Charlie and I decided to have a very calm next weekend, cooking good food, watching some movies and just being, together.

The Pride has definitely left traces in me. I had decided that I would mainly spend time experiencing it this year, not get too involved in the work. Still, I ended up being a poly tent host and taking part in the parade, which was more than I had expected a few months ago. And as early as monday or tuesday, I started feeling like I was right at home. These are my peers, I share quite a number of values and views around sexuality, love and respect with them, and I stopped counting the number of times I said "YES" in my head quite early. I wept in recognition a number of times.

I know that I want to contribute more to the poly section for next year. I've ideas that I need to write down. Charlie has some as well (I think we share some ideas ;-)).

Seeing myself grow from somewhat passively looking around to getting in front and showing myself, from wondering what this experience would be for me to feeling proud about who I am in this context, from feeling a bit shy to stand up for myself, that's quite something, and it's very encouraging. Encouraging in more ways than one, I "came out" to 5 coworkers yesterday, and the conversation that followed was quite a good and respectful one all in all, even though lightly sparkled with the expected standard package of stupid jokes, but hey, people will always react to the things they aren't used to, this is nothing new...

Through all this, my connection with Charlie has most definitely grown, and I know she's sensed it too, because she talked about this as a bonding experience, and it surely has been. I can't really say exactly how, but it's obvious our relationship has deepened even more over last week.
Gawds I love that woman!

The story with Åsa that ran alongside all this seems to have taken a new, somewhat deeper direction as well, but it's yet to be determined what that will really lead to...

Finally, and this is something I've just mentioned it a little here and there, there's a connection with Jenny (who lives in Australia), although it runs over limited time, and is thereby a pretty different experience. I have never been in a loving connection that I knew beforehand would have an end and exactly when that end is. Somehow, although I could never have imagined it like this, it feels very easy, and I've simply settled to enjoy whatever there is to enjoy in the moment that we have and will then gladly and lovingly (although probably with a tear) see her go away, maybe never to meet again.
So far, we've enjoyed some cuddly moments and moments of good talk and understanding. It's all good.

You know, although I'm damn tired today, I also feel LIFE! It really is all good.